A few things I'd like to point out to marketing execs.

[cr0w]

1.) If you're pitching ideas for a radio commercial, skip over whoever suggests they make one that is supposed to be a conversation between two people. It never sounds natural, and I doubt a conversation between a mother and daughter would sound like this:

Mother: "Hi Brandi, would you like to go shopping at the Almeda Mall this weekend? It's tax-free weekend, and we can get all kinds of great deals on back to school clothes, uniforms and supplies!"

Daughter: "Sure mom, Jessica got her uniform at Foley's, Britney got hers at Clothes 'n More, and if we spend more than $250 on back to school supplies, we get a free gift certificate to JC Penney!"

Mother: "Great Brandi, lets go this weekend, they're even having a sale on music and movies at Sam Goody, and you can get two $20 movies for $22 if you bring in this coupon I got in the free mailer today."

Daughter: "Awesome, mom! Can we go Saturday, the 31? 94.5, The Buzz, is going to be there broadcasting all of today's hottest alternative music along with hits from the '90s, and they're going to be giving away bumper stickers and shirts for people who stop by the booth!"

Ugh.

2.) TV commercials featuring singing children aren't cute, they're fucking annoying. See, contrary to popular belief, putting an ugly, tone deaf brat on my TV screen singing about Oscar Meyer bologna/hot dogs isn't going to make me want to buy your product. It's going to make me want to puke it up. If I see that commercial one more time, you're going to have an international incident on your fucking hands, you cocksuckers.

3.) If you're a car salesman/insurance salesman/mortgage or loan officer, don't fucking come on my radio and talk to me like you're my friend and you give a shit about my debt and/or whether or not I need a good car at a great price. You make your money by selling shit, don't fucking pretend you care, because I know your bottom line is how much commission you're making on everything you sell. Don't come up with stupid fucking campaigns that claim your salesmen are there to help us make the right choices and guide us every step of the way because they truly care about what we buy. Fucking admit that they work 12+ hours a day and their income hinges on whether or not I buy the shit they're showing me. They don't give two fucks about what I buy, so long as I buy it. Using a soft tone of voice and claiming to care may trick an 85-year-old grandmother who's in need of an insanely gigantic Buick she can't even fucking control nor drive over 25 mph in, but it's not fooling me, you God damned son of a bitch.

<font color="#dedfdf" size="1">[ July 29, 2004 11:50 PM: Message edited by: cr0w ]</font>

[swhalo]

You're my idol. [img]graemlins/thumbs_up.gif[/img] [img]biggrin.gif[/img]

You could be the next maddox. [img]wink.gif[/img] [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[cr0w]

Naw. I'm too smart to be the next Maddox.

[Walnutter]

Ah, the sweet sounds of a Single White Male, ranting at the family targeted media.
It's like Angels Singing Metalica or something angry [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[(predator25)]

amen.
lol

[cr0w]

Hey. Being a single white male has nothing to do with it, really. If it's stupid, it's stupid, no matter what demographic you're a part of. I can guarandamntee that if I was part of the "family" targeted by the media, I'd still think it was ridiculous, simply because the things I'm ranting about are, quite frankly, targeted at people who don't give things a second thought and/or take them at face value. I guess my time in the retail business has exposed me to the fact that the bottom line in all of this is money, so I want them to cut the bullshit and get to the point.

And then you have the Oscar Meyer commercial, which is just fucking retarded no matter who sees it.

[Walnutter]

Can't really argee with you on how lame most(all) Radio commerecails are, but all they are trying to do is relay info, and they use the stupid convo becuase a lotta women like to talk, don't ask me.

[Halitosis Crunch]

That Oscar Meyer commercial drove me to a psychotic breakup.

Stupid ass kids.

<font color="#dedfdf" size="1">[ July 30, 2004 09:13 PM: Message edited by: Halitosis Crunch ]</font>